Friday, February 26, 2010

Occupation: Advertising - Google, Inc.

Three days ago I posted a blog concerning the recent appearance of Google advertisements on my blog and website. I casually suggested that readers should click on a few links and help a poor college student earn some walking around money.

I thought at best I would end up with 15 or 20$ by the time this blog had run its course upon my return to the states...three months from now. I had no idea that after 3 days I would have accrued over $25!

Now in my mind this means one of two things:

1) You people really love me and have way too much free time on your hands to continually sit around and click on advertisements on my blog (not that I'm complaining though).

2) Its actually not as hard as I originally thought to earn a little revenue via web advertising. The fact that a handful of my faithful readers (which is ultimately all of you) clicks on one or two links a day is actually earning me some extra dough.

But lets not get ahead of ourselves.

As much as I'd love to think I'm going to be rolling in the Benjys before too long, in reality that probably isn't going to happen. This could just be Google's way of saying, 'Hey welcome to the world wide web kid. Take a number." These high grossing payments could be the initial kickbacks given to new recruits.

Despite my skepticism, lets just keep on left tapping those mice people.

Today I set up Google Analytics which is a nifty little web hosting tool that allows website owners to assess the traffic their site's receive. It breaks down all the user content to valuable information such as channels used to access the site, average time spent, links clicked, pages viewed, where their IP address is hosted, so on and so forth.

Its actually very interesting material; hopefully with such information I can ultimately increase the inflow of traffic to my sight thereby increasing my revenues.

Regardless, until the time comes where my site receives more hits/day than the almighty Google itself, I'm trusting in YOU to keep on being the dedicated readers I know you are! Your time is valuable to me. Literally.

Deviating momentarily from my propaganda, the CUBC student body and myself visited Brugges, Belgium today for a relaxing day trip. I'll be posting a blog on related material tomorrow so keep an eye out for it!

Wishing everyone the best.

All good; all the time,

Thomas

Thursday, February 25, 2010

Touch Down, Man Soup!

Soup that eats like a meal -Hearty. Nutritious. Delicious; that's the slogan for the mini microwavable Cambell's chunky soup commercials.

You've more than likely seen commercials featuring Philadelphia Eagle Donovan McNabb eating his small 1 1/2 cup portion of the selected brand of Cambell's Chunky Soup. The camera zooms in, holding his paper dixie cup sized bowl of 'filling' soup. He takes a bite, smiles, and is instantly gratified because the meager 1 1/2 cups of sustenance managed to stifle this 6' 2", 240lb quarterback's hunger. Well let me tell you folks, McNabb has obviously never heard of Man Soup. That's right, Man Soup.

Carrefour, the world's second largest retailer (under Walmart), has recently had to go through a restructuring here in Brussels. Generally this wouldn't bother me so much except that it actually means my local grocery store went out of business a few days ago and I am for the moment, left without an alternative. I think that the immediate response from most readers would be,

"So, just go to another store."

And believe me, I see your point. However, when you're on foot, carrying everything you purchase, and the closest retailer is over a mile away, it makes me a bit inclined to start telling stories like Ol' Jack LeGrand featuring tremendous trecks through snow, up hill both ways, 15 miles, frost on your mustache, ice sheets on your bald spot, carrying your stone tablet, and barefoot because they hadn't invented New Balance running shoes yet. You get the picture.

[Its times like this my Silverado would sure come in handy.]

So what happens when you get 4 hungry, fairly active, male, college students locked in their house with nothing but scraps and enough individual random left overs to leave an anorexic hungry?

MAN SOUP.

The glorious combination of every particle and morsel of food a common college student would think to eat (minus taco bell). Folks, we're talking chicken, ham, bacon, beef, tortellini, onions, tap water, bell peppers, tomatoes, carrots, potatoes, mushrooms, dropped eggs, gouda, garlic, sugar (I mixed it up with the salt), milk, butter, pepper and then salt. All swilled together to form one ultimately epic dish, that I dubbed, MAN SOUP.

Now don't get too excited. I know it sounds delicious, but before you dash off to the kitchen to try and wip up your own batch, you aught to know that I left a key ingredient out. Its actually not that hard to come by and costs me less than half a euro, but I'm going to keep it to myself for now. Who knows, I might one day make a killing in a restaurant with my specialty dish as MAN SOUP. So for now, it stays secret. (Lucky for me I don't have some sketchy talking golden retriever trying sell my secret recipe every time he gets off his leash.)

What was the point of this blog other than to waste five minutes of your day and give you ample time to click on my advertisements and make me extra money? Nothing really, except to let the world know that no matter where they are, who you're with, how sunny it is, and what bill Obama is failing to pass...you are still missing out because YOU don't have Man Soup.

Enough said.

All good; all the time,

Thomas



This is the kind of physique that can only be obtained after 100 years of barefooted, uphill, snow trudging.


SHOUT OUT FOR MUSTACHIO!

Wednesday, February 24, 2010

A Capitalist in a Socialist Country


Everyone is always looking for ways to make an easy buck [or euro] and I am no different. Be it returning grocery carts to their dispenser for the deposit or counting every single cent I find on the street, I'm always in the business of looking for more business.

I've had several questions over the past couple days concerning the sudden appearance of Google advertisements on both my blog and website.

"Thomas, why can I all of the sudden find 'singles in my area' from advertisements on your website?"

Well, ladies and gentlemen, this is another personal attempt at further funding the 'Thomas McGuire Retirement Fund'. Every time you visit my website or blog Google debits me fractions of a cent. I get paid just because so many of you are faithful readers of my life (although I can't imagine why).

Now, if the advertisements actually entice you enough to click on them, I get paid fractions more. How exciting!

As far as the actual content of the advertisements go, I assure you that I do not personally have any choice over what Google posts. Apparently the adds are cleverly chosen based on the content present on the site (which really doesn't explain the 'singles in your area'). I'm skeptical as to how much revenue I'll actually bring in considering the dividends per visit are so minuscule, but hey, a dollars a dollar no matter how you look at it!

I've got finals next week as well as a lot of last minute work to do, so that enough personal promotion for one day. Hope all is well!

[Click away people, click away! Just kidding. But seriously. Click.]

All good; all the time,

Thomas

Sunday, February 21, 2010

Cpt. Kangaroo, Thunderboxes, & Crunchy Heads


"Oih, wheres your thunderbox?"
"Our..., our what?"
"Your thunderbox, I gotta use the thunderbox"

Just one of the many cultural differences and discrepancies I encountered this weekend while attempting to understand 'aussie'. As with everything abroad from the United States, it was a learning experience.


While staying at our hostel in Prague we met some interesting people. This of course can be expected anytime you throw 30 random individuals of all ages, sizes, and ethnicity in a room and tell them to sleep. (Have you ever tried to rest while a 45 year old male Bulgarian is sawing logs in the bunk above you? Have you?)

This is where Candice & Tiffany Quinlan come into the story. We first met the Quinlan sisters in the hostel's kitchen our second night in Prague. I sat at the table eating a well rounded dinner (which probably included multiple portions of every food group) and watched them hopelessly try to saute sun dried tomatoes, chucked zucchini, and ridiculous amounts of salt. In the end I couldn't help myself and had to casually poke fun at their attempts. Its pretty hard to cook sun dried anything past it being sun dried and I felt like it was worth pointing out to them. We struck up a conversation and they ultimately joined my comrades and I on multiple excursions throughout Prague.

When we parted ways we told them to look us up if they ever headed our way and passed through Belgium.

Who came knocking on our door a week later? Yep, the Quinlan sisters.

In reality, they actually cleared it with us first via facebook and we gladly re-extended the invitation for a weekend pit stop in Brussels.

Tiffany and Candice are on their summer 'holiday' from 'Uni' (University) in Australia, touring around Europe for a month. Both are a year from graduating and saw this as a final opportunity to hit the road and see the world before having to enter the wide world of grownups. The sisters share a spunky and happy-go demeanor concerning just about everything, making them very enjoyable to have around in the dismal Brussel's weather. While they did sport very strong Australian accents, it hardly compared to the stereotypical American's depiction of Outback Steakhouse commercials. Their English was English none the less, but at times it was hard to decipher what exactly they were trying to say. Imagine putting two males in the same room, one from the deep south and another from a well to do family in the north, and you'd likely have a similar translation problem. Here are a few of the more comical conversations we had with each other.

"Oh yea, you were dominating the d!" - Aussies
"What? "- Me [Completely bewildered. You can probably imagine why.]
"Dominatin' the d." - Aussies
"What the hell are you talking about?" - Me
"Dancing! You were dancing a lot on the dance floor. Dominating the dance floor." - Aussies
"Please don't ever tell another American male that he was 'dominatin the d'. That is not okay, I promise." - Me


"Oih, wheres your thunderbox?" - Aussies
"Haha...our what?" - Americans
"Your thunderbox, the outbox, the thunderbox. Do you have one?" - Aussies
"I honestly have no clue what you want. Speak American." - Me
"The bathroom! Its a thunderbox. Bathroom/thunderbox. Same thing" - Aussies
[I lost it laughing at that point for obvious reasons.]

"Forget that noise." - Americans
"What noise?" - Aussies
"No, not like literal noise, I just mean that is dumb." - Americans
"Then why call it noise if there is no noise?" - Aussies
"Aigh', never mind." - Americans

They also say:
  • 'mate' = friend
  • 'sheila' = female/woman (shawty get low? or sheila get low?)
  • 'tkep' = ketchup
  • 'Uiy' = pickup truck
  • 'Uni = University/College
  • 'Holiday' = Vacation

Not so much a conversation, but in case you ever run into Paul Hogan and he calls you a crunchy, I'll go ahead an enlighten you as to the implications of the statement.

In America, we make fun of blond women for...well for being blond women [why wouldn't we?] Well the Aussies were one step ahead of us. At one point or another (probably multiple) we made fun of their blond hair and fitting demeanor; they countered by calling us crunchies. Initially we laughed, because once again we were at such a loss as to what they were saying it was incredibly humorous. They went on to explain to us that, like a crunch bar, crunchies are brown hair on the outside and blond demeanor on the inside. While actually trying to insult us, they inadvertently empowered males everywhere with evidence to sight not only blond women, but now brunettes as 'blond' like persons.

I speak on a personal position here, but I easily got along with them better than anyone else we've met in our travels. They wore cowboy boots, listened to American country music & classic rock, hunt kangaroos (not split-toe), and like to eat meat (minus the sun dried tomatoes incident). Could Australia be my second home? Maybe.

Oh and they dislike the French, which gives rise to the question, why do I not have more Australian friends?

We took them around Brussels; sampled the fine chocolates, 'sampled' the Belgian beer, and grabbed a waffle. We had a great time and told them that if they ever (again) came through Brussels to let us know.

Candice & Tiffany are somewhere between here and Paris at this moment, the final stop on their European excursion. We had a blast and wish them the best of luck in the remainder of their travels.


4600 thousand miles from home and I meet someone who, although from a different homeland, its incredibly similar to myself. Who would have thunk it?

All good; all the time,

Thomas

Tuesday, February 16, 2010

Czech Me Out!

Situated on the Vlatva River in central Bohemia, Prague has been the political, cultural and economic centre of the Czech state for more than 1100 years. For many decades during the Gothic and Renaissance eras, Prague was the permanent seat of two Holy Roman Emperors and thus was also the capital of the Holy Roman Empire Today, the city proper is home to more than 1.2 million people, while its metropolitan area is estimated to have a population of over 1.9 million.

The taxi ride from Prague central airport to Hostel One took a little over 20 minutes and cost about 600 crowns (the Czech currency). Luckily between the 8 of us, that is actually pretty cheap since 20 Crowns is equivalent to about 1 US $.

Prague is a relatively cheap city food and drink wise comparative to everywhere else in Europe. Their inflation is through the roof though and carrying around a handful of 1000 crown bills feels a bit strange.

The city is essentially divided into two parts: New Town and Old Town Center. Old Town is where the majority of the historic sights and tourist attraction are including the Royal Palace. There is a large open square with food market and many odds & ends for sale at an elevated price comparative to elsewhere in the city. This area of town is littered with historic churches. Almost every other block has a chapel/basilica/cathedral but this makes sense when you consider the fact that hundreds of years ago, the Papacy was based out of Prague and not Rome.

The New Town (I found it ironic that its name includes 'New' because it literally looks like something pulled out of the 1970-80s era Soviet block) is a bit run down. It was hard to see the city as it is meant to look because of the serious amount of snow accumulation on everything. I met a girl from Prague that spoke amazing English and she told us that this is the most snow Prague has gotten during her lifetime (this seems to be a strong winter world wide).

Everything is very spread out though. Most days we ended up walking 12+ miles to get to and from the landmarks we dubbed as worth seeing.

We came to Prague for Mardi Gras and although the main festival is today there was still plenty to see and do in preparation for the event. Unfortunately I couldn't stay for the grande finale because I have a test tomorrow evening but the portion we did experience was pretty awesome.

The trip was great; the people were the closest to American we've encountered, and the food was cheap. I loved it.

Hope all is well.

All good; all the time,

Thomas

Worldly Travels


Last Thursday my comrades and I headed out for Prague, Czech Republic. We had an amazing trip and arrived back in Brussels yesterday evening late.

Some of you may have seen on the news that there was a major train wreck in Brussels involving a line that connects Brussels' city center with Charleroi - Sude (thats our airport). Some 20 people died and other 50 were seriously injured when the train derailed after a head on collision with another train. Fortunately our flight was delayed and we didn't make the train. Had conditions in Prague been clear; my companions and I would have more than likely would have been on that train. That thought definitely makes you stop for a second and think.

Fortunately we're all fine and back to business as usual here in Brussels. Check back over the next couple of days as I post content and details from my trip to Prague.

Hope everything is going well for all those back home!

All good; all the time,

Thomas

Amsterdam (Continued)


The tour of the Red Light District was an 'eye opening' experience. You saw exactly what you expected but Ryan threw in all the history and modern day regulations of the business giving the tour a very interesting spin. Only 5% of the District's customers are Dutch where as 75% of the service users are UK men between the ages of 18 and 33.

The tour lasted roughly 2 hours and we wandered about a bit more on our own before calling it a night.

Amsterdam, while obviously one of the most international controversial business places in the world, is undoubtedly one of the most accepting, unlikely to judging, and all around hospitable places I've visited.

If you ever decide to travel to this funky town; keep an open mind.

All good; all the time.

Monday, February 8, 2010

Amsterdam, Arrival & Day 1:

Amsterdam....

Although you may have never visited this historic city, you have no doubt heard of its reputation. To accurately describe the city in its entirety while still maintaining a PG rating on my word choice....lets just say its going to be pretty difficult. Ladies and gentlemen, you're just going to have to bear with me and use your imagination (if you want).



The Arrival:

Our EuroLines bus pulled up to the Amstel Central Station around 9:45pm. A large portion of the city is built in a radial fashion with canals that wind and twist through the city streets and alley ways. After a series of wrong turns, broken Dutch conversations, and 30 minute treck through the city we arrived at our temporary residence, Hotel Linda. My comrades this trip included Andrew "JewJew" Blayton, Charlie "Chuck" Sipple, Nils "Grandpappa" Peterson, and Brittany "BHALLarious" Hall.

We shared a room with 5 other individuals, but none were to be seen when we arrived. We walked around for an hour or so our first night just taking in the night life but ultimately called it a day as to get an early start on the following day.



Day 1 in Amsterdam:

We arose at 8 am and set out to find some food (Usually the number one priority on my mind. I can handle cold/hot; I can handle tired; I can handle stressful...but I sure have a hard time handling anything if I'm hungry.) After searching for something within our budget I settled on a small bakery that had some fruit filled pastries.

There is an organization that puts on tours for "those on a budget that still want the full experience. They are based in numerous tourist destinations throughout Europe and I fully plan to use them when possible because of how well done our tour was. We met up with our tour guide at 10 in front of the National Monument. (The dutch are terrible at naming things. The name of their central national monument is...The National Monument, which is half a block from New Church, which is two blocks from Old Church, which is in turn down the road from "the Bridge" [which is a bridge, believe it or not]; so on and so forth).

Our guide, a lively Australian named Ryan, has been moving from major European city to city over the past decade or so and claims that Amsterdam is without a doubt his personal favorite. I was pretty skeptical about how entertaining and informative a "budget" tour could be, but Ryan's engaging oration and constant jumpy demeanor kept everyone in the group focused on what he was saying. Most who travel to Amsterdam have a sense of mysticism concerning the direct activities of the city. People hear about the Red Light District, they hear about the Cafe shops, they hear its a party city, but they never really know what to expect. I was no different. Ryan spent the next 5 hours walking around the city with us hitting all of the major points (i.e. Anne Frank House, Red Light District, Coffee Cafes) as well as the smaller and finer aspects of Dutch life (law, culture, and general info about the cities citizens). When it was all said and done, I had a pretty good bearing on knowing my way around the city as well as understanding the in and outs of how day to day life works in such a funky city.

One thing I noticed upon my arrival to Amsterdam was that all of the buildings looked askew and not at all squared off with one another. Door jams leaned one way, windows leaned another, and sometimes the entire building leaned way forward as if it was going to tip outward into the street. At first I just thought the Dutch were terrible builders (except for Dikes) but Ryan set the record straight. The offset door jams and windows were a result of the city being built entirely upon marshland, but the buildings leaning into the streets was in fact on purpose. Being an old shipping town, many of the buildings had storehouses in the upper levels and building the buildings slanted outwards allowed for goods to be hoisted up without them banging into the side of the structure and damaging the goods. I looked at the building and then asked, "Why not just extend the main roof beam out into the street and save yourself the trouble of building a slanted building?" He looked at me for a second, smiled, and then responded that it took the Dutch hundreds of years to solve this problem and that I'd just solved in 5 minutes (maybe my college education is paying off, but don't get your hopes up mom & dad).

After the tour Ryan offered to take myself and my fellow travelers to one of his local hangouts and we gladly followed. We met several of his "mates" and it seemed he was a fairly popular guy in the town. We hung out with him for a while before he had to leave and give another tour but before leaving, he convinced us to come on his Red Light District tour that evening and see a slightly darker and less censored side of Amsterdam.

We walked around aimlessly just taking it all in for a while longer. Each rode looks exactly like the last. Each of the buildings; all equally jammed between one another, line the canals all the way around the city. When I thought of Amsterdam's scenery I pictured cobblestone bridges, small canals, lots of bicycles, and windmills; that is pretty much the jest of it.

Speaking of bikes, apparently its a felony in the Netherlands to steal someone's bike (let me remind you that this is the same country that legalized marijuana and prostitution back in early 2000. As well as the same city that legalized pissing in the streets so long as it doesn't splash on someone else's shoes and that you may engage in 'intimate' activities after dark in a park so long as you are more than 100m from an elementary school.) Bike theft can get you up to a 15 years in prison; however, like everything in Amsterdam there is a back door rule. If you get caught with a stolen cycle; the only way you can escape punishment is if you fling the bike off of a bridge in a canal and it sinks completely. If any part of the bike is visible, tough luck chief, you're going to jail.

While I'm on the subject of strange laws; if you somehow manage to drive your vehicle into a canal you can be charged for littering in the canal systems which of course is a felony. But wait! There's a back door rule here as well! If you're still sitting in your car (which is in the canal) when the police arrive, they are obligated to jump in after you and save you because you are a citizen in distress, thereby relinquishing any penalty you would have incurred for littering the canal with your car...(which I'm sure was intentional).

We met back up with Ryan at his meeting point and set off to the Red Light District with a group that was composed largely of the same individuals we went with earlier that day.

To be continued..........


All good; all the time,

Thomas

Sunday, February 7, 2010

Did You Know....?

This is an interesting video that was shown to us in one of our Marketing classes. It applies a lot of interesting facts on an international level. I just thought it was relevant being abroad and all.

If you've got 5 minutes take a sec and watch it.

Back to Belgium


We got back into Belgium this evening around 6:00pm. We had a great time but I'm pretty happy to be back at our apartment just being so tired from constantly being on the go.

Check back over the next couple of days and I'll repost everything from our travels.

Hope all is well!

All good; all the time,

Thomas

Tuesday, February 2, 2010

Belgian Life


All in all, not much has changed in Belgium.

The weather continually fluctuates between snow/sleet/rain hovering around the 0 degree Celsius mark. The absence of sun is more noticeable than ever.

Since returning from Paris, our lives have been standard routine. Our teachers did remind us this past week with a load of homework that while traveling abroad is fun, our main function here is still to be students.

We're heading out to Holland tomorrow after classes and staying in a hostel fairly near the Heineken brewery (It should be assumed that I will be taking a tour).

Though as with Paris I will not have my computer, thus internet availability will be limited to my itouch and hopefully a McDonald's Cafe. Be sure and check back next week as I recount our travels through Holland.

I hope that everyone who is following this is doing well.

All good; all the time,

Thomas